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THE CHRONICLES OF RIDDICK UNRATED DVD REVIEW
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Part I (No Spoilers) |
Part II (Spoilers) |
Part III.1 (Spoilers)
Part III.2 (Spoilers) |
Part III.3 (Spoilers) |
Part IV (No Spoilers)
III. DIRECTOR'S CUT ANALYSIS (Spoilers)
I'll admit right off the bat that this is (probably) not an exact list. I watched the theatrical version a few times, but my request to Universal for a copy of the theatrical DVD to compare didn't pan out, so we're stuck with my wretched memory. Those of you with better memories are welcome to return and taunt me for my errors when you get the DVD next week or if you saw the movie enough times to immediately know I’m wrong.
The Director's Cut really fixes some critical stuff, making the movie more enjoyable and also better structured as far as storyline. Before I get to the details on why, I'll hit you with the part that hurts; not everything is fixed.
Jack is still named... Jack. Did anyone else think it was pretty ridiculous that the girl-masquerading-as-a-boy in PITCH BLACK was actually named Jack? Now sure, the reveal of her real name in the original PB script was dropped from the movie so it might have been tough to find a way to refer to her, but still.... Jack.
The Necromongers are shrouded in secrecy despite the fact that they ram giant statues into planets. Hell, if I rammed my truck into a cool enough building somewhere in town, my Mom in Florida would probably be watching it on TV twenty minutes later. How could these guys possibly keep their activities secret? And why does Imam speak in riddles about them when there's a freaking envoy from the Space UN sent specifically to Helion Prime? Twohy should have ditched all the "They say..." and "You know, 'Them'" stuff and gone straight to "HOLY FUCKING SHIT IT'S THE NECROMONGERS!"
The Lensors can still see through mountains and into space but can’t see Lejjun and Ziza behind a little wall ten feet away?
Why do the Necros bother wearing that useless damn armor? It doesn't stop guns, knives, feet, or fists.
I'd better stop there. Here's the good stuff, with a half-hearted attempt at describing whether the addition is a whole scene, just a shot, or dialogue.
ADDED (scene): Kyra put into Hellhound cage
Straight from the book and the two pages of script we've seen comes this scene from Crematoria. Guards wheel a box into a room full of cages, put it next to an open one, and slide the front lid up. There's a pause when nothing happens, then they grab their maulsticks and start jamming the handles into the air holes in the sides of the box. We still haven't seen her yet, but Kyra grabs one of the handles, yanks it so the hammer head falls off, and jabs a guard in the obvious place. She finally retreats into the cage when they draw their guns, and curls into a corner with the hellhounds going crazy around her.
I think it's good to have this back in, as it very lightly introduces her so there's a bit more resonance when Imam and Riddick talk about her in the upcoming scenes. Plus, it's always good to see someone get their balls crushed.
ADDED (scene): Shirah Dream #1
As Riddick drifts into sleep aboard the Merc ship he just stole, he repeats his line from PITCH BLACK about everything shutting down in cryosleep. But as he finishes off the line, Shirah adds her own touch, at which point we see her with Furya in the background. She walks forward to Riddick, where he wakes up above Helion Prime.
This is a great addition, of course, introducing this link to Riddick's past, hinting at his origins, showing us a glimpse of another cool world, and of course adding Kristen Lehman back where she belongs. I really don't get Twohy's comments about this putting in too much mysticism; mostly it adds interesting mystery. I sure hope we find out someday just exactly who Shirah is, what space she exists in, and how she's contacting ol' Richard B.
DELETED (dialogue): "Follow this"
In the theatrical version of TCOR, Riddick delivers a cheesy line right before bumping the Helion fighter trying to corral him when he first enters the planet's orbit. This line has thankfully been removed, although the bump remains.
EXTENDED (scene): Imam in New Meccan street
Between where we first see Imam walking down some stairs and when he enters his house, there is now some additional footage of him walking through some crowded streets as people can be heard speculating about what's coming. Looks great and really adds some life to the idea that this is a real planet, but the people whispering and talking sound pretty fake (which it seems to me is common for this kind of ‘crowd noise’ stuff).
MAYBE (dialogue): "Your wife; she's in the shower"
When Riddick reveals himself to Imam right after the dopey line "Did you know you keep your doors locked?" (why, why, why?), Imam glances upstairs and Riddick follows his look. Riddick then gives the ominous line above. I think this is an addition.
EXTENDED (scene): Aereon's extra expository moment
Just a little bit extra where Aereon describes the Elementals. If the third movie was really going to heavily involve them, then it is probably a good idea to give the viewer of this movie as much information as possible.
CHANGED (dialogue): "You're not afraid of the dark, are..."
Great change here... it appears that a totally different vocal take was used of Vin's delivery of "You're not afraid of the dark, are you?" right before snuffing out the candles and attacking the Helion soldiers. The original version, also used in the trailers, always seemed to really drone to me. This one has a lot more life to it. The second part, "The light, it hurts my eyes" has been removed. Still no explanation as to why Riddick just beats these guys up rather than dicing them as would be his wont. Yeah yeah, I know, PG13. Next.
MAYBE (shot): Profile of Necro fighter getting blasted
Can't remember if this is new or not, but the very first thing you see as the nighttime attack from the sky begins is a profile of a Necromonger fighter flying along and then getting blown away. This is immediately followed by the shot of the fighters escorting a larger ship. Am I making this up? Oh, and DVD proves itself fun once again as by doing a frame-by-frame you can get a closeup shot of one of the (naked) fighter pilots in the open cockpit looking at the audience.
MAYBE (shots): More shots of grunting Necro trooper holding Icon staff
Could be wrong here too, but I think the part where the Necro troopers on the ground run toward the Helion troopers is a bit longer, with additional shots of the guy holding the Icon staff grunting and all that.
EXTENDED (scene): Riddick offering to take Imam and his family
Right after the Icon staff explosion, while Riddick and Imam are waiting for the troops to pass outside their hiding spot, Riddick tells Imam about the ship and offers to take them offworld. He gets in a good line here, "I'm sure God has his tricks, but getting out of places no one else can... that's one of mine."
REVISED (sequence): New Meccan Council Chamber
This sequence isn't quite as changed around as the Crematoria surface fight, but there are still a lot of differences that are very positive. Gone is the shot of Dame Vaako stroking the hair of one of the Helion girls standing near her. During the Purifier's speech about the Underverse, he also mentions the Threshold and then there's a shot of a big group of Necros that all chant out "Threshold, take us to the Threshold!" in unison.
Next up is during Riddick's fight with Irgun. In the original version Riddick only stabs him once, and this had always bugged me... why does a huge guy who has obviously survived being stabbed before all of a sudden go down just because he gets stabbed again, only in the front this time? The answer is that in the *real* version of the movie Riddick shoves the knife in three times, and I mean SHOVES it in. This gives a lot more weight to the idea that yep, Irgun is finished.
Another interesting one is in the exchange between the Lord Marshal and Riddick. Here the scene carries on after the tussle over the knife, where LM kind of cocks his head quizzically at Riddick and asks, "Have we met, on some distant field?" Riddick quips "You'd think I'd remember" and Lord Marshal returns with "You'd think I would too." To cap off this fun extra little bit of good acting, there’s a very welcome line change. In the theatrical version, Lord Marshal demands that the Necros “Take him away for mind-regression.” This didn’t sit well with a lot of people (including myself), but the new line should; “Take him before the Quasi-Deads.” It makes more sense to make a reference that’s obviously to a bit of the movie’s fiction, rather than say something that just sounds a bit silly.
Good changes, all.
ADDED (scene): Furya vision during Quasi-Dead mind regression
More Shirah, and all the boys say “Yeah!” During Riddick’s mind regression by the Quasi-Deads, he has another vision of Furya and Shirah. Shit, am I spelling Furya right? Furia? Oh well, I’m too far in to this review to change it now… Anyway, now we get another piece of the puzzle, as this dream also shows a shadowy figure in Necromonger armor framed by a doorway with flames behind it that is of course the Lord Marshal. Pretty good memory, considering that Riddick was an infant at the time. Plus, more Shirah.
And again, this stuff is far from just adding mysticism. Now we’re starting to get answers. But who knows, Joe Sixpack was probably so crosseyed confused at this point that maybe the deletion helped, I dunno.
ADDED (shot): “Who is this man?”
I loved it in the trailers, and it’s back… an interesting skewed up-angle shot of Dame Vaako, right after Riddick fights everyone off and escapes from the Quasi Grotto, where she says the line.
EXTENDED (scene): Mercs capturing Riddick in New Mecca
Bits and pieces changed around here. I don’t think Toombs said “Should dust my dick when you get the chance” in the theatrical version, but I can’t remember. One definite change is that Logan comes up to Riddick, cuffs him and looks up and says “Let’s go, big boy.”
EXTENDED (scene): Vaako makeout scene
And so here we have it, promised in the very first teaser trailer and then cruelly taken away. Or something like that. Anyway, when Dame Vaako and Vaako are conspiring, the scene carries on a bit longer. Vaako gets pissed at her treasonous words, cracks her in the face and knocks her across a sarcophagus. She looks up at him with a hilarious line, “Finally, some attention!” followed by an even more hilarious closeup of Vaako’s momentary piss-take before she tackles him. Maybe the only second in the movie where I actually enjoyed Karl Urban’s performance (loved him in LOTR, though. Weird.). He pushes her down, a little tease of shapely brown thighs, then there’s the kissing and the smooching and the breathing and stuff, all in closeup. Dame Vaako suggests they go down to the throne where he can sit and she can, y’know, kneel.
Part I (No Spoilers) |
Part II (Spoilers) |
Part III.1 (Spoilers)
Part III.2 (Spoilers) |
Part III.3 (Spoilers) |
Part IV (No Spoilers)
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